Counting Some Sheep

[lmno401]

An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and so he decides to go to see his doctor. "Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at night," complains the man.


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inquired the doctor.


The accountant replied, "That's the problem, Doc. I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it!"

[lmno401]

A construction worker came home just in time to find his wife in bed with another man. So he dragged the man down the stairs to the garage and puts the guy's dick in the clamp. He secured it tightly and removed the handle. Then he picked up a hacksaw.

The man, terrified, screamed, "STOP! STOP! YOU'RE NOT GOING TO.. TO.. CUT IT OFF, ARE YOU???!?"
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The husband said, with a gleam of revenge in his eye:

"Nope. You are. I'm going to set the garage on fire."

[gongfan01]

en are like computers: Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.

Men are like coolers: Load them with beer, and you can take them anywhere.

Men are like coffee: The best ones are rich, warm, and keep you up all night long.
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Men are like horoscopes: They always tell you what to do, and they are always wrong.

Men are like plungers: They spend most of their time in the hardware store or the bathroom.

Men are like parking spots: The good ones are taken, and the rest are handicapped.

Why is psychoanalysis quicker for men than for women?

When it's time to go back to childhood, he's already there.

Why are men like commercials?

[lmno401]

Rodeo Position
Two guys in a bar are discussing "positions" so one tells the other, "Well my favorite is the rodeo!"

and the other says, "What's the rodeo?"

"well, first you get your wife down and start tocheap Louboutin Sandals
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[gongfan01]

A Scotsman is sitting on a train across from a busty blonde wearing a tiny mini skirt.

Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top of her thighs.

To his delight, he realises she has gone without underwear.
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The blonde realises he is staring and inquires, "Are you looking at my growler?" "Yes, I'm sorry, " says the Scotsman and promises to avert his eyes.

"It's quite alright," replies the woman, "It's very talented, watch this, I'll make it blow a kiss to you."

[lmno401]

He went up to it and there he saw the street car had ran into a man and literally torn him to pieces. All that was left of him that you could see was his arms, legs and his penis.
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Well he was just startled by all this so he decided to go home. When he got home, he said to his wife: "Hey Honey, you know I just saw the darndest thing. Out on Mill Street a street car had ran into a man and cut off his penis and I swear it had to be a foot and a half long!".

"Oh no! Shultz is dead! Shultz is dead!" she sobbed.




。

[gongfan01]

We’ve been waiting to find out how Castlevania: The Adventure Rebirth would end up. Fortunately, Famitsu has finally provided the first look of the game in its latest issue.Wholesale MLB Jerseys
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NFL Jerseys sale The magazine even states that the upcoming WiiWare title will be releasing in Japan in two weeks. It isn’t the best quality because the image taken isn’t a direct scan, but it’s better than nothing!

[chentuan]

Who knows how far the other side in the end? Whether to have an answer? Those who are struggling in the sea of people anxious not want progress, but never can not get to the other side. Not want to turn back, but had lost the way back on the route.
Finally realized, the heart has far, far the other side there. Across the center of the line who can? I took the time to stay in the ridiculous scale, hands-on hiding under the disguise of love. How I would like to feel the fullness of your palm, more than you want to pour into the embrace of soft.
However, when I want to stay again and again, that final touch of tenderness, when it found that it had quietly gone. I have been watching this, keep looking until it's backs gradually deep.Fine clothes and shoes wholesale price Click to enter converse shoesIt turned out that not every tear will be drained. When placed nowhere stranded sad, vaguely melancholy echoes again, it's worth pondering the millennium, with the attendant fall into the old wind forest, roll up the absolute sound eras Chilian.
Space-time fully shown bleak, the newborn warm retreat step by step, wake up smile also disappear. Humid text, so there is the taste of tears, covered with a land there lies. I know, I never bother to forget, even though parting is the former agreement, I still want to be your life can not ignore the dedication.

[lmno401]

SYMPTOM: Mouth contains cigarette butts.
FAULT: You have fallen forward.
ACTION: See above.
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SYMPTOM: Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet.
FAULT: Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of
face.
ACTION: Retire to restroom, practice in mirror.